Work can put fear in people, and the fear stays. The fear grows after a bad meeting. So the team needs good leadership. Good leadership starts small, and the leader talks first. The leader talks before the fear grows.
“Fear makes people small,” says Dr. Kim. Dr. Kim studies work life, and she sees many teams. Teams with kind leaders feel better after a hard day. Somehow, the hard day hurts less after the leaders talk. But teams with cold leaders lose their best people.
And how do the leaders soothe a team? First, the leaders soothe the fear, and they talk often. A frequent short talk keeps fear from growing. And the talk carries news to the workers. So the workers worry less. When the workers worry less, the leaders keep a quiet voice. Somehow, one quiet voice makes the team less afraid.
But quiet leaders still give hard news. And the workers deserve the news face to face. Dr. Kim says the team can still handle bad news. “What they cannot handle is silence,” she says. After the silence, the workers feel concerned. When the news is late, the workers think the worst. When the news comes on time, the fear goes away altogether. And the talk keeps the fear away. A frequent talk also cuts the team's nervousness. Dr. Kim saw one team stop worrying altogether after a year of talks.
“Good leadership is a small and slow practice,” says Dr. Kim. The leaders make this practice slow and quiet. And the practice starts with one question: “How do you feel today?”